Unknown
Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist
201–220 (422)
tiny.ag/6jbweh3g · submitted 1999 by John Cannizzaro
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
tiny.ag/fsy6lb1v · submitted 1997
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
tiny.ag/stfdm53a · submitted 1997
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
tiny.ag/aqhc8mvh · submitted 1999 by Glenn Troester
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
tiny.ag/ugvde1cx · submitted 1997
If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?
tiny.ag/d6tftb8q · submitted 1997
If everyone would sweep in front of their own door, the whole world would be clean.
Unknown, (Middle Eastern proverb), in Vice and Virtue
tiny.ag/eanvvuth · submitted 1997
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
tiny.ag/fwsgb93v · submitted 1997
If it weren't for caffeine I'd have no personality whatsoever.
tiny.ag/piw4y7md · submitted 1997
If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
tiny.ag/rh0iiyqp · submitted 1997
If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.
tiny.ag/gjpds4m8 · submitted 1997
If only I could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.
tiny.ag/0xhdtnul · submitted 1997
If people talk negatively about you, live so that no one will believe them.
tiny.ag/ipnqtb0n · submitted 1997
If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot dog stands on the moon.
Unknown, in Men and Women
tiny.ag/h7w28305 · submitted 1997
Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
Unknown, in Life and Death and Work and Recreation
tiny.ag/z8yeojw9 · submitted 1997
Democracy is a government where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
tiny.ag/z91tc0go · submitted 1997
It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
tiny.ag/ynrgodhh · submitted 1997
Death is nature's way of recycling human beings.
tiny.ag/u05c2aqo · submitted 1997
Nothing is difficult to those who have the will.
Unknown, (motto of the Dutch Poet's Society), in Success and Failure
tiny.ag/oumhmbbr · submitted 1997
Official Project Stages: (1) Uncritical Acceptance. (2) Wild Enthusiasm. (3) Dejected Disillusionment. (4) Total Confusion. (5) Search for the Guilty. (6) Punishment of the Innocent. (7) Promotion of the Non-participants.
tiny.ag/me4bnv2q · submitted 1997
Ogden's Law: The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
201–220 (422)