Aphorisms Galore!

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Aphorisms Galore! lets you Feed Your Wit by browsing, searching, submitting, and discussing aphorisms and witty sayings by famous and not-so-famous people.

Welcome! The computer thought you might be interested in these aphorisms today, taking into account things like their recent popularities and how new they are to the collection:

tiny.ag/o5og0ube  ·  submitted 1997

A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.

Hermione Gingold, in Food and Drink

tiny.ag/5rylx71v  ·  submitted 1997

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

David Dunham, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/jx4okg6p  ·  submitted 1999 by Michael A. Loduha

When skunks duel, wind direction is everything.

Michael A. Loduha, (on environmental factors in legal cases vs. the attorneys' skills; from a lecture series), in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/0spygbpd  ·  submitted 1997

Money may be the husk of many things, but not the kernel. It buys you food, but not appetite; medicine, but not health; acquaintances, but not friends; servants, but not loyalty; days of joy, but not peace or happiness.

Henrik Ibsen, in Wealth and Poverty

tiny.ag/uz9atcqm  ·  submitted 1997

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.

Hubert H. Humphrey, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/b3ohbca1  ·  submitted 1998

He who spends his time reading aphorisms of another to have one of his own, has no time or brains to have any of his own.

M. Bernheisel, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/wh6qtopk  ·  submitted 1997

I improve on misquotation.

Cary Grant, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/uvpjrb6x  ·  submitted 1997

Desperation is like stealing from the mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/ctd7inn0  ·  submitted 1997

I got a simple rule about everybody. If you don't treat me right, shame on you.

Louis Armstrong, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/qn3ryz0y  ·  submitted 1998

Freedom is not the right to live as we please, but the right to find how we ought to live in order to fulfill our potential.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Wisdom and Ignorance

tiny.ag/5x9cvfxv  ·  submitted 1997

I wouldn't mind dying -- it's that business of having to stay dead that scares the shit out of me.

R. Geis, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/s3j4zgfm  ·  submitted 1997

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

Garrison Keillor, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bpcdcqq7  ·  submitted 1997

Hitch your wagon to a star.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/otueqvds  ·  submitted 1997

A man who seeks truth and loves it must be reckoned precious to any human society.

Frederick the Great, in Law and Politics

tiny.ag/1zzynlyn  ·  submitted 1997

These are not books, lumps of lifeless paper, but minds alive on the shelves.

Gilbert Highet, in Art and Literature

tiny.ag/1i8zitnu  ·  submitted 1998

I wish to have no connection with any ship that does not sail fast; for I intend to go in harms way.

John Paul Jones, in War and Peace

tiny.ag/w4s36qc2  ·  submitted 1997

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/hrd6aj12  ·  submitted 1997

A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood.

George Patton, in War and Peace and Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/ocxoq7dr  ·  submitted 1997

We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality.

Albert Einstein, in Science and Religion

tiny.ag/ig3zfjp4  ·  submitted 1997

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

Winston Churchill, in Law and Politics